CA Day 3- Hot Dogs, Hooters, and Huge Museums
Today I started out by checking out a beloved California coffee chain called Blue Bottle. Though they technically started out in Oakland, they showed up in my research for top coffee spots in LA so I figured it would still count. Plus, I needed much sooner than it would take to drive to the bay area (little did I know that while I was on the road they were opening up their first stores in my home state, and in Harvard Square no less!). The coffee was good and strong, but it did feel like it came in a kinda small quantity for the price which is a common theme with fancy coffee shops. I really liked their simple pop-y logo on the cup though, so that made me feel better even if does confirm that the evil geniuses who work at advertising are 100% right at how susceptible our dumb monkey brains are to cool pictures.
Right around the corner from coffee shop was a cool little shopping called the West Hollywood Gateway so I could buy a new phone charger for my car. One thing I’ve noticed about LA is that even if malls are inherently slightly tacky, they do a much better job than most cities in integrating them into the general landscape with more outdoor components that are way nicer to look at and walk around than the average strip mall.
After my shopping, I decided to get a healthy lunch at one of LA’s many delicious salad bars. Just kidding, can you even imagine that if you’ve read this far? No, for brunch I went to Pink’s Hot Dogs, a local institution that started out as a little hot dog cart purchased with $50 loan before transitioning to a beloved brick and mortar shop known for a huge selection of different dogs, low low prices, and hundreds of signed photos of celebrity customers. The main reason I wanted to go there though was that it was prominently featured in an episode of one of my all time favorite shows, Nathan for You (link at the bottom). I got the Mulholland Drive Dog (the hot dog stand is featured in that excellently weird David Lynch film) which features a 9” dog covered in grilled mushrooms and onions and then liberally doused in nacho cheese. It is a beautiful and delicious abomination that very much lives up to all the hype around the place. Apparently the record for most Pink’s hot dogs eaten in a single day goes to Orson Welles who ate 18 in one sitting which is just bananas.
After my healthy healthy meal, I began to set out for the day’s destination, when my car abruptly started making a truly horrendous noise. I assumed something must be up with either my brakes or my muffler, and either way I figured I should not delay getting it looked at. I took my car to the nearest Firestone, where I was informed that the noise was just my muffler being a little loose which would be an easy fix but one that they don’t do. I was also informed that my brake pads had “exploded” and “looked like two pieces of charcoal” which they were much more concerned about, and they asked that they hold onto it and work on that right away. Also it would be $700. This wasn’t the best news to start the day with, but I figured it would be better than driving around with exploded brakes.
They were gonna be working on my car for a couple of hours, so rather than be completely sidelined I called a Lyft and continued on my way undeterred. My main destination for the day was to see the Getty Center, a massive museum housed in gorgeous architecture designed by Richard Meier and tucked into the naturally beautiful hills of LA’s wealthy Brentwood neighborhood (made infamous by O.J. Simpson). The museum was bequeathed to the public by J. Paul Getty who was famously once the richest man in the world and also a very poor hostage negotiator. Getty left the museum a $4 billion trust which, after a dip due to bad management, they’ve been able to grow to over $6 billion making them the wealthiest art museum in the world. Two nice benefits of all that wealth (beyond the exhibitions themselves) is that admission is totally free to the public, and you don’t even have to walk up the hill to get to the museum as they have a complimentary hovertrain (like a much smaller and slower bullet train) that takes visitors to and from the parking lot and the museum. Besides just being a nifty bit of technology, the train also gave some pretty incredible views out over the city.
With the exception of any special exhibitions, most of the artwork at the museum comes from Getty’s personal collection which based on his interests consists of pre-20th century paintings, sculptures, and decorative arts and 19th and 20th century photography. The only modern and contemporary pieces to be part of the museum’s permanent collection are the sculptures that are speckled throughout the grounds which make for a pretty impressive introduction before you’ve even entered the museum.
The big special exhibition while I was visiting was an impressive collection of artifacts from Egypt that traced different trade routes between Egypt and other major civilizations of the ancient world. To telegraph this exhibition and also wow visitors right from the get-go the main lobby had 20 ft. high (give or take) Egyptian obelisk that had been made for the Roman emperor Domitian around 88 AD. Apparently Roman emperors were crazy about these obelisks, and after being blown away by this lobby I can see why.
Luckily the rest of the museum lived up to the expectations set by the lobby. I started diving into the permanent collection with the North Pavilion building which houses art from before the 16th century. This isn’t necessarily my favorite time period for painting, but I was absolutely impressed by all the decorative arts from that period. They had ceramics, glass (stained and otherwise), and furniture work from that period, and it was amazing to me that it had survived at all let alone was still so technically and visually stunning. It’s also strange to me, given that I don’t actually have any art history knowledge beyond just going to all these museums on this trip, that it looks like the craftsmen and artisans from this time based on the designs on the plates and windows had a better grasp of perspective and anatomy then a decent number of painters from that time. It seems like it should be more difficult to accurately render the world on functional objects than on a canvas, but I really don’t know. Some highlights for me included drinking vessels called pilgrim jars which were usually made from earthenware or glass with intricate designs so that traveling drinkers could show off how fancy they were. They also had some stunning medieval manuscripts which were unfortunately non-photographable.
This pavilion also had a sculpture courtyard filled with beautiful bronze pieces that were shockingly lifelike. I’m also extra impressed that people were able to make such incredibly well-realized forms out of materials like metal, plaster, and stone at a time when it seems like most painters were unable to make a non-horrific looking baby.
The second floor of this pavilion had more traditional European artwork from before the 16th century, so lots of baby Jesus. This can be a tad boring to me despite the skill and historical significance involved, but there were also a lot of religious paintings like the ones below that focused on the darker and more fantastical biblical stories which are more my kind of weird, so I was still pretty happy.
Some highlights for me included: a painting of Zeus molesting Danae as a shower of gold by Orazio Gentileschi that to me looks more like a naked woman throwing money at a baby (beautifully realized of course); a lush portrait of the abduction of Proserpine (the Roman equivalent of Persephone) by Alessandro Allori that’s filled with all kinds of weird stuff in the background which I absolutely love; an incredibly opulent altarpiece carved from wood and then painted with gold leaf and tempera for extra fanciness by Cenni di Francesco di Ser Cenni in 14th century Florence; a doom and gloom crucifixion piece by my dude El Greco who just seems so much more surrealist than his contemporaries with his distorted forms and colors; a beautiful piece from the workshop of Leonardo Da Vinci (but not the original version by the master himself) of a sweet scene of the baby Jesus with his mom and grandmother; and of course a scene of a wildly drawn baby Jesus breastfeeding from a very improbable position because that’s the kind of thing I’m always fascinated by how otherwise amazing paintings just can’t get down.
The piece that cracked me up the most though was a painting by Domenico Beccafumi supposedly of Saint Catherine receiving the stigmata, but which looks more like a flying Jesus going around shooting terrified nuns with lasers. Y’know even the son of God just has to cut loose once in a while…
Up next was one of the special exhibits while I was there, a room dedicated to recent acquisitions from some pretty big names. It wasn’t a huge gallery, but the quality was just astounding! It’s always cool to see the famous names actually living up to their hype. My personal favorites included: an incredible pen and ink drawing by Michelangelo (not the Ninja Turtle); another incredible sketching of Gluttony by an artist named Jacopo Ligozzi who was known for just going way weirder than his Renaissance contemporaries; a storyboard for Mission Impossible: Eagle Hunter (i may have embellished the title) by Francisco Goya; and a stunning pastel drawing of a candid bather by Edgar Degas.
After the masterpieces, I made my way to the East Pavilion, where I started with a gallery of pieces by Dutch and Flemish masters. I’m not sure if it’s just because I see slightly less art from this region to British and Italian art from that time period, but this gallery really stuck out to me as pretty exceptional (as I write this, I have no idea if it’s true because intellectually I’m positive I’ve seen a bunch of Dutch masters I just haven’t paid enough attention so it feels true). There’s just something about the ridiculous attention and the dreamlike colors that really got to me. My favorite pieces included: a stunning ivory relief (carved from a single tusk!) by Francis van Bossuit of a very gross scene in the bible where two creepy old dudes accost Susanna while she’s bathing (it really is an odd book); an equally gorgeous and goofy painting of Noah assembling all the animals for the ark by Jan Brueghel the Elder; a very badass painting of the Virgin Mary stomping on snakes and demons by Peter Paul Rubens (not Pee-Wee Herman); a bizarre little scene of Jupiter disguised as a white bull running into the sea with the princess Europa rendered in lush detail by Rembrandt; a spooky woodsy landscape by Meindert Hobbema with just an insane level of minute detailing; and an incredible collaboration between Peter Paul Rubens and Jan Brueghel the Elder of Mars being disarmed by Venus, with some sublimely silly use of cupids. I never knew that these famous artists ever collaborated, and I think it’s super cool that they were actually friends and not rivals, and the teamwork really led to some incredible art.
I almost missed my favorite piece in this gallery because it was actually on the ceiling, and I don’t always think to look up. The piece by Gerrit van Honthorst is a neat optical illusion called Musical Group on a Balcony that turns the museum’s ceiling into a beautiful skylit balcony complete with all the lute players and parrots you could possibly want (it’s one parrot, one parrot is enough).
The next gallery was a special exhibition showcasing finely carved Japanese lacquer boxes that had been a part of Marie Antoinette’s personal collection. Marie may not have been the best queen, but she sure had excellent taste in imported crafts. I was not super familiar with laquerware so my mind was resoundingly blown when I learned that this was all wood which had been meticulously carved and treated with special saps and dyes to produce the uniquely rich colors. It’s also cool just realizing how much trade and mutual influence was occurring between Europe and Asia as early as the 18th century, because I feel like we learn about history on both continents in different classes so you think of them being discreet when in reality history co-occurred everywhere and frequently overlaps in interesting ways.
The next pavilion had one of the Getty’s secret weapons that really sets them apart from other museums I’d been to: a whole floor of lavishly decorated period rooms. Rooms decorated in period styles and decorative arts are not in and of themselves unique to the Getty, but to have a whole floor of them is insane and the quality and variety of artifacts was just jaw dropping. There was also just about every kind of art making on display including woodworking, painting, jewelry, sculpture, silver-work, tapestry, glass-work, assemblage, and of course interior design. The sheer wealth of craftsmanship was almost overwhelming, and its ridiculous to me imagining the kind of wealth people had to live in whole houses done up in any of these individual styles. The vanity required is almost as gross as all the art and furniture is beautiful.
My personal favorites of all this high-endery included: the Borghese-Windsor Cabinet, a cabinet that once belonged to a Pope and consists of carefully crafted wood rubbed with different dyes and varnishes and inlaid with all kinds of precious stones and metals for a really unique and shiny kind of grandeur, and a monumental cabinet designed by André-Charles Boulle for King Louis XIV that has built in sculptures mounted beneath the drawers that are as incredibly made as they are seemingly impractical. Again I just can’t imagine using something that lovely to just keep my socks in or whatever.
In between the pavilions was a hallway with some incredible views over the hills as well as classical Greek and Roman sculptures including this sassy little bastard right here:
From there I took a little break from all the man made beauty to go on a jaunty walk on the southern promontory to look out over one of the museum’s incredibly curated gardens as well as the City of Angels.
In the last of the permanent collection pavilions, we got a bit closer to modern times with 18th and 19th century European paintings. We started with some pre-impressionist romantic and realist paintings with sweeping landscapes, lush allegorical scenes, and snazzy portraits of the upper-classes (until Millet positively shocked the art world with a portrait of a working farmer. Scandal!)
My favorite pieces here included: a pretty metal scene of Perseus brandishing Medusa’s severed head to turn an enemy army into stone painted by Sebastiano Ricci; a shockingly casual early oil painting of a threesome (possibly the first of its kind) by Théodore Géricault that was much franker depiction of sexuality than any of the other contemporary pieces; and a painting of Rome by JMW Turner that has an incredibly dreamy hazy quality to it that is not actually caused by my camerawork but by Turner’s ridiculously innovative approach to painting.
At this point, I stepped outside on a terrace because I had noticed the sculpture below of a fat bald man/baby with a flagging erection riding a horse and screaming to the heavens and I could not stop laughing at it:
At last I made it to the Impressionists, who were my personal favorite painters in the museum’s permanent collection, and the collection had a real murderer’s row of heavy hitters. There was Renoir, Gauguin, Cezanne, Van Gogh, and of course Monet, and the vivid colors and slightly more abstract forms really captured my fancy and felt like a cool culmination of all the artwork leading up to it until all hell was about to break out at the turn of the next century. It’s a fun and beautiful narrative to follow and look at.
There were also a few German Expressionist paintings, including Starry Night by Edvard Munch and the Dragon Slayer by Franz von Stuck below, which were nice darker moodier companion pieces to the lighter flowery impressionist works. It must be the longer winters the further north you get in Europe.
At this point, I was already close to three hours into this museum, and while I was really enjoying it, I think this hilarious choice of a self-portrait by Joseph Ducreux was one of most relatable pieces of art I’d seen in a while:
The bottom floor of this pavilion opened up with a pretty stellar sculpture courtyard. These sculptures also largely came from the 17th and 18th centuries so they a lot of the same impressive craftsmanship of the more classical sculptures, but with stranger and more dynamic poses and designs to really show the evolution of the form. It didn’t matter how sleepy I was, it was hard not to be pretty impressed.
This floor also had a couple of special exhibits on it. The first special exhibitions I saw was about a really interesting period late in Rembrandt’s career where he just started making meticulous drawings of royalty from Mughal India. The drawings were paired with paintings from India from that same time period, and it was incredibly cool to see how these paintings influenced Rembrandt and also how the later Indian paintings were also influenced more by European art. It was a fun blend of cultural exchange to watch unfold in a single gallery especially sine all the art was of insanely high quality and detail. I was not particularly familiar with Mughal art, but it’s a testament their talent that I think in a lot of cases these artists kind of blew Rembrandt out of the water.
The rest of the floor was dedicated to photography and we got both our first modern and our first American pieces. The first photography exhibit was a collection of photographs by the Canadian artist Robert Polidori from a series he did during the 1997 renovation of the Getty Center. Polidori was given pretty unprecedented access to the museum at a time of a transition, and his photographs of ridiculously valuable art wrapped in plastic or lying the floor near where it was going to be hung up was a fun mix of totally eerie and humorous as it really demystifies the allure of an art museum to see behind the curtain. The almost divine looking lighting in the photo below made it a favorite of mine:
The next photography exhibit was a fascinating look at the rise of photography in 19th century America. It was both an amazing look at several tumultuous moments in History including the Gold Rush and the Civil War, and also a cool way of tracing the evolution of the medium and the technology behind it. They had daguerrotypes, silver gelatin prints, prints on salted paper, and even early attempts at colored photography where artists would carefully paint over the black and white prints.
My favorite piece here, obviously, was this insanely unexplained tender moment between Washington and Lincoln in Heaven (didn’t know they allowed photos) called Washington + Lincoln Apotheosis which sounds like next summer’s hot new buddy cop film.
Next up was an exhibit of contemporary photography focused on artists who use cut paper to introduce bizarre and fantastical tactile elements to their work. Some of the artists photographed creations made entirely out of cut paper from magazine or similar printed materials to create otherwise impossible tableaus, while some layered paper onto existing photographs or cut designs directly into photographs to either highlight or disrupt particular elements. All these pieces were pretty funky, but I was into them because all the techniques were really unlike anything I was familiar with.
My favorite piece here was a photo called Models by Matt Lipps who created super well composed still lifes from carefully arranged photos clipped from various sources and colored paper cut into interesting abstract shapes. The blend of surrealist imagery with very well done photography hit my sweet spot of impressive craft and silly intentions.
Lastly in this building, I discovered a hidden gem while I was looking for a bathroom. John Baldessari, who I really loved at the Broad Museum, had a piece called Specimen (After Durer) tucked away in a stairwell that consisted of a print of a tiny detailed drawing Albrecht Durer made of a beetle blown up to immense proportions and applied to the wall with massive stainless steel pin cheekily sticking out of the drawing as if it was a real mounted beetle. It was very goofy, and I was a big fan.
Finished with the permanent collection, I made my way to the largest special exhibition, the collection of Pieces that had been traded between ancient Egypt, Greece, and Rome that had been teased by that obelisk in the lobby. Mentally I was starting to fade so I didn’t read things as well as I should have, but again it was super cool to see just how much more connected the ancient world was than I had previously realized. Historically it was really funny that a lot of these Egyptian pieces were discovered in the homes of wealthy Greek or Roman aristocrats because that must have totally shocked the first archaeologists to come across them , and aesthetically seeing the fine materials pigments that the different cultures gained through trade incorporated into the artwork was just astounding. There was jewelry of pure gold; sculptures of alabaster, granite, bronze, marble, and beautiful black basalt; glasswork; and of course, a mummy.
My personal favorites of this collections included: a ridiculous sculpture of a god riding his own massive penis like a horse because you know times were more innocent back then; a stunning hippopotamus carved from a material called red marble that I’d never seen before; a tiny richly detailed hedgehog made from a bright blue rock called faience (it’s amazing how well these colors have been preserved 2000 years on); and a stone painting that I would love more information about featuring images of tiny dwarflike beings fighting giant monsters and maybe riding a hippo. It was such an impressive exhibit all around.
Amazingly there was still one more entire building left to the museum: The Getty Research Institute, which contains a research library, archives, laboratories dedicated to furthering knowledge of visual arts, and the occasional special exhibition. While I was there, the special exhibition was dedicated to Harald Szeemann, a Swiss artist and curator who is considered to be instrumental in breaking the mold of contemporary curation by creating more avant-garde exhibitions focusing on novel techniques and global collaborations. The exhibition featured a number of pieces from various shows Szeemann curated as well as posters and advertisements for them (art in their own right) and his own personal writings. Some of the exhibits he helped curate included using non-traditional everyday materials such as match boxes, records, or telephones and more conceptual pieces such as photographing paintings in various landscapes as opposed to hanging up the painting itself or sending unsolicited design suggestions to NASA.
My favorite pieces here though were from early exhibitions Szeemann curated featuring works from artists that were “mentally ill”, art from religious and Utopian cults, and art from science fiction. These pieces were in more traditional media than the avant garde stuff, but they felt just as radical and it was kind of heartwarming to see someone put serious focus on artists that were otherwise being ignored by the larger art world.
Lastly, as I was leaving their was a really nice poem written by Szeemann that they put on the wall by the gift shop that I thought was quite lovely and fittingly sweet and strange:
In a lucky bit of timing, just as I was finishing up in the last museum building I got a call from Firestone that my new brake pads were all good to go so I got a Lyft back out of the hills. They didn’t fix my muffler, so my car still sounded horrifying but at least I didn’t have to worry about the brakes being exploded which was honestly a pretty big relief. After that massive museum, I was in some pretty desperate need for more coffee. I drove up to the Hollywood area, because I was going to be meeting friends around there for dinner and one of my friends had recommended a coffee shop up there called Urth Caffe, which had super cute hippie vibes, excellent cookies, and some good strong coffee.
After recharging, my met my friends Sam and Micah at Canter’s Deli so we could partake in the great LA tradition of a show-biz diner. Our friend Sierra had a pretty amazing gig opening up for Melissa Villasenor from SNL at the Improv later, so we were all going to go together to get some good laughs and brownie points for being supportive friends, but first we had to gorge ourselves on the finest meats. I got something called a Little Dip, which was a panini style french dip with simply beautiful roast beef, muenster cheese, and onion gravy on the side. It was so dang good, and also pretty huge for something with little in the name.
All the food was superior, but I had such a nice time seeing my friends I’m amazed we got any eating done at all. I hadn’t seen Micah since he graduated the year before I did so it was great to see him, and just sort of be a fly on the wall for he and Sam’s behind the scenes TV stories from their times working as writer’s assistants for different shows. I had a few good stories from all this road-trippin’ to share as well, and between the three of us there were a lot of laughs all through dinner, but thankfully nobody had any deli meats shoot through their nose.
With full bellies, we made our way to see Sierra’s show at the Improv. The show was called Woman Crush Wednesdays and it was hosted by Marcella Arguello and featured a stellar lineup of female comedians. The lineup included Chase Bernstein, Tashi Condolee, Akeyla Aluko, Sierra, and the headliner Melissa Villasenor, and everyone really knocked it out of the park.
Marcella - I’m a tall woman and let me just say the tops of your refrigerators are disgusting
Chase- I met a girl who told me about her sand collection. Oh, you collect sand? What’s your least interesting fact?
Tashi - *she was actually possibly my favorite comic of the night energy-wise but so many of her jokes had a singing element to them that I don’t think they’d make any sense in writing*
Akeyla- My dad used to make on dates with other women, and for a long time I didn’t think cheating was wrong because I’d always get a piece from whatever the new girl’s job was. There was a whole month where he was being faithful, and I was just like “Get back out there, Dad, I need new shoes for prom”
Sierra- I’ve been getting into self-defense lately. They say one thing you can do is put your car keys between your fingers like wolverine. Then if some creepy murder tries to get you, you can just turn out and stab them with your key claws. Like “who’s the murderer now!” The student has become the master.
Melissa Villasenor was a hell of a headliner. She’s still new and a little underused on SNL, but she is such a weird, funny, and talented person who can about flawless impressions (including Steve Buscemi which I’ve never heard anyone else do!), well written stand up, and some truly out there conceptual bits like a strip tease performed to the tetris theme. She’s got lots of videos of her impressions but for whatever this very silly sketch is my favorite:
The show was a blast, and when it was over Sam and I bid farewell to Micah and Sierra and went to try our luck at a late night open mic above a Hooters. Our friend Veronica was doing a showcase at the Hooters before the mic, so we wanted to see her and she had said that sometimes the mic was really good. I try to be very positive when talking about the comedy everywhere because open mics are where people try new stuff, so everyone’s trying their best and it won’t all be good, but let’s just say this was exactly what you might expect a late night open mic at a hooters would be. It was another lottery, which neither Sam nor Veronica nor I were lucky enough to get called on, but we did get to watch a cavalcade of mostly white dudes talking about dicks and see some guys at the table in front of us take photos of a waitress as she was bending over to pick up a pen. It was pretty gross, though to be clear that wasn’t the fault of anyone running it because you can’t predict what people are gonna say and do but yikes. That beings said there were still a few really good comics.
Robert Schultz - It’s really hard for a business to truly separate themselves from bad mascots. Like Jared from Subway is still known as Jared from Subway.
Jason Unakis- I just masturbate to vague ideas like trust
Nolan Culver- my dad had a fake business he wanted me to fake run. That's a con man joke
Alex Cohn- Vegas is the only place where you can get sexually transmitted daddy issues
Max hooper- I didn't like my name growing up because there were two other Maxes in my neighborhood and they were both golden retrievers
To understand why my favorite comic of the night, GT, was my favorite comic of the night some context is helpful. Right before GT, the comic before him told maybe the worst joke I’ve ever heard. This guy just went up in front of the crowd at Hooters and used the first 2 of his three minutes to do a shockingly bad and tasteless Bill Cosby impression (an unfortunate but forgivable choice), but as a closer he really eviscerated the concept of good taste by saying “I think it’s unfair when you see a homeless person with a hot girlfriend. I was with my buddies the other day and we saw that, so I said to them, “Why don’t we beat him to a pulp and then gang rape her?” There’s no punch line! Just two crimes! The room was very tense after that, and then in the craziest most wonderful move I’ve ever seen a comic do this guy who just went by GT came on the stage and did a straight minute of bird calls without any lead up or explanation. The crowd went from revolted to intrigued in a flash, and when he finally spoke after, and please picture this, one minute of bird calls he said indignantly “And can you believe that birds be asking me, do I have an accent?” I lost my mind. I don’t know if that man is a maniac or a genius or both, but that set was just a ballsy dose of unbridled silliness that it actually managed to save the tone of the rest of the night after the set before him could have potentially ground everything to a halt. It was commendable honestly.
After the show, Sam and I tried to go hang out at party at the Comedy Store, but I ruined Sam’s chances of getting in because the guy at the door didn’t recognize me as a comic. Then another drunk LA comic called us “Podcast Fags”, but we got some good cheap drinks and I saw this sweet neon Andy Kaufman so I was still pretty happy. It was nice of my buddy to forgo the chance to mix and mingle to hang out with little old me, but it made for a sweet finale to a rollercoaster day of comedy.
Favorite Random Sightings: Juice Butchers (I didn’t know juice needed that); A tribe called sweat (kind of a gross name for a gym, classic hip-hop reference notwithstanding); Trashy Lingerie (callin’ it like it is, I guess); Hair are us (grammar are not)
Regional Observations: I’ve never seen more Valet parking before than in LA, but after trying forever to find parking for the Improv it kinds makes sense to me now.
Albums Listened To: Something Else!!!! by Ornette Coleman (not having the car for most of the day meant not many albums but this was a good ‘un)
People’s Favorite Jokes:
I didn’t get any today so here’s one from the internet:
All of his life Len from Cape Breton had heard stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 21st birthday. On that day, they'd walk across the lake to the boat club for their first legal drink.
So when Len's 21st birthday came around, he and his pal Corky took a boat out to the middle of the lake. Len stepped out of the boat and nearly drowned!
Corky just managed to pull him to safety. Furious and confused, Len went to see his grandmother. "Grandma, it's my 21st birthday, so why can't I walk across the lake, like my father, his father, and his father before him?"
Granny looked Len straight in the eyes, and said, "Because, you idiot, your father, grandfather and great grandfather was born in January, you were born in July."
Songs of the Day:
Bonus My Friend Doing Stand Up:
Bonus Andy Kaufman Doing Stand Up:
Bonus Nathan For You at Pink’s Hot Dogs: